Rants and Riffs Installment #12: Greeting cards, too-early calendars, and cable companies

infant ranting
Greeting card makers…since when did your product need that glued-down third ‘page’? The minute I pull a card from the case and feel that extra heft, I know that baby’s going to cost an extra buck.

Moving on…
A curious question from a snail mail donation plea…”How are you enjoying our 2020 calendar?” It’s September of 2019! Why would I have a calendar out three months ahead of time? And really, enjoying a calendar?

And finally…
Cable companies forcing you into ‘bundles’. All I want is fast Internet access! No, I do not want Keeping Up with the Kardashians, meaningless statistics spewed by sports networks, or some poor mosquito-bitten shlub relying on a palm frond [if we’re lucky] for warmth.

 

Some good writing quotes…

word cloud with keywords quotes, writing Atwood Trillin Rosenfeld

While I’m sure these first two quotes exist elsewhere, I found them courtesy of Jon Winokur. By the way, one of my favorite books? W.O.W. [Writers on Writing] by Jon Winokur.


As far as I’m concerned, “whom” is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler.

Calvin Trillin


You most likely need a thesaurus, a rudimentary grammar book, and a grip on reality. This latter means: there’s no free lunch. Writing is work. It’s also gambling. You don’t get a pension plan. Other people can help you a bit, but essentially you’re on your own. Nobody is making you do this: you chose it, so don’t whine.

Margaret Atwood


No matter how grand or ordinary your idea, you must take it through an alchemical process that transforms it into a story.

Jordan Rosenfeld